When rude customers are getting on your nerves, there are healthy and not-so-healthy ways to react. Experts offer seven tips on how to roll with the punches (without throwing any!) when threatens your mental health.
1. Stay Calm
The
average person faces around 30 frustrations (or minicrises) every day,
and a high proportion of those frustrations occur at work, says St.
Paul-based licensed psychologist Anna Maravelas, founder of Thera
Rising, a conflict resolution and organizational development
consultancy, and author of But overreacting to a faulty copy machine or
an insulting colleague by going into high-drama mode and losing your
temper will end up hurting far more than it helps. The cortisone,
adrenaline and other chemicals released when you have a temper tantrum
will linger for at least two hours after your outburst, Maravelas says.
“You don’t want to bring all that toxic energy home with you,” she says.
2. Have Some Empathy
Remember,
those 30 daily frustrations aren’t just happening to you, but to every
person you encounter during your workday, from the rude customer (who
isn’t always right, by the way) to your flighty boss. “People are
worried about their kids, mortgage, job loss and health insurance,”
Maravelas says. With so many stressors in the world today, she suggests
cutting people some slack and assuming there’s a reason they’re not
behaving perfectly. “Be hard on the problem, but soft on the people,”
she says. “That creates positive reciprocity. They’ll remember how you
gave them the benefit of the doubt and will pay you back someday when
you need it.”
3. Tune Out
Another
technique for managing stress is to simply limit your exposure to
office drama. “Close your door if you have a door, or close your mind if
you have a mind,” says Simma Lieberman, an Albany, California-based
organizational development consultant. “Unless you find it cathartic to
get into arguments, when you feel tempted to get involved in office
politics, plug in your iPod or music player, stick your headphones in
you ears, and just act oblivious.”
4. Perfect the Art of the Blow Off
Don’t
get sucked into conversations with irritating coworkers. If someone
walks up to you to purposely get a rise out of you, Lieberman says, a
good response is, “Wow, really. I’ve got to get back to work. See you
later.” If they’re say, “Wow, interesting, but I’ve got to go,” or “Why
are you saying that?” If they’re just always in your face, trying to
interact socially (like a grandma constantly showing photos of her
grandkids or selling their cookies), walk away or -- better yet -- ask
them to do a favor for you. “They’ll run away,” Lieberman says.
5. Break the Bad Mood Cycle
Good
moods at work are contagious, but so are bad moods, says Long
Island-based Debbie Mandel, author of and a radio host and
stress-management expert. “You don’t have to internalize a colleague’s
bad mood,” she says. “Either physically move away to break the or else
get immersed in your work because negativity is contagious.”
6. Look for Humor
Mandel
is also a believer in humor as a stress reliever at work. “Don’t take
yourself and everyone else so seriously,” she says. “Pretend it’s a
sitcom. If it happens to someone else on TV, we’re laughing, but when it
happens to us, we take everything so seriously.” So have a little
People who make others laugh are “positive magnets who are the life of
the party,” Mandel says. Even something as simple as putting up a funny
screen saver can lighten your mood and others’ moods.
7. Close the Door at the End of the Day
Don’t
leave issues unresolved at the end of your workday. “If you’ve made a
mistake or gotten into a hassle, take the time to apologize in a
nonobsequious way,” Lieberman says. “If you go home with stuff left
unresolved, it’s hard to feel sane.” On your way home, visualize the
door to your workplace closed, and start thinking about what you’re
looking forward to at home,” Lieberman says. Then, start fresh the next
morning. Mandel agrees. “Every day is a new chance to shine,” she says.
“The slate is clean. It’s a new beginning, a fresh start.”
By Megan Malugani, Monster Contributing Writer